The Cream-apult

Tired of your coworkers pelting you with marshmallow shooters when the boss isn't looking? Want to even the fight and come ahead of the office competition in the least mature manner possible? Look no further.

From the minds that brought you the Easy Bake Oven Recall comes the next in confectionery achievement: The Cream-apult!!

A lightweight, portable catapult that can be stowed in your desk, the Cream-apult deploys easily and launches true. Simply hold the launcher steady on a flat surface, such as a desk or coffee station, release the lever, and let the whipped cream fly! Your coworkers won't know what hit them.

Each Cream-apult comes with three two-inch-diameter pie molds and an 8oz squeeze tube of our proprietary blend of banana cream filling and essential minerals. Easy to whip out for some whipped topping fun! Find out why so many people love the Cream-apult. The Washington Post called it “Airborne Tetanus,” Rachel Ray said the cream makes her skin burn, and the LAPD bought enough to arm their riot police.

Our team of engineers, with the exception of Sarah who quit over matters of conscience, have done the math so you don't have to. They insist the Cream-apult is perfectly balanced to launch one to three cream pies in a perfect arc that will always land cream-side down, for a distance up to six feet.